I've had an awful day. "What happened, O Exalted One?" I hear you ask. Well, it wasn't traffic, it wasn't a shitty commute, it wasn't the weather, it wasn't annoying people or general inconveniences. No, it was being confronted with pure and untainted stupidity twice in one day.
Every now and then, you come across something so overwhelmingly stupid it hurts you a little bit. You can feel the front of your brain eating itself out of sheer desperation to get away from the stupidity you just felt. Whelp, I got that twice. The pain is still overwhelming, no amount of King Crimson and Bob the Angry Flower can cure it. Both of those things are awesome, incidentally, ch-ch-check it out.
So, stupid incident one: Rebecca Black. Yeah, I know, how edgy am I, making fun of the latest pop princess fad thingy whatever. May as well start making fun of the beeb while all my hipster friends chuckle ironically and listen to Arcade Fire. It's not so much her song that pisses me off, mostly because I haven't heard it, it's just the nature of that song's existence. Let's break it down, shall we? So, she's 13, a product of the ARK Music Factory, singing a song (I assume) about the day of the week called Friday and the opportunities it holds. First things first, fuck ARK and bullshit mission to "make it possible for emerging independent artists from a variety of popular genres to be discovered, defined and delivered, to advance in their chosen career and be successful" (taken from their website.) Note, as anyone with half a brain has probably decoded, the carefully chosen wording that renders that entire passage meaningless. They may as well be saying "we at ARK make it our mission to autotune the shit out of stuff and then give it the stupidest video imaginable so it goes viral, ensuring us fat stacks of royalty cash." Hell, that's exactly what they're saying. So anyway, ARK are the devil.
Then, why is a 13 year old singing about Friday night? What do 13 year olds do on a friday night that's so song-worthy? Because if my assessment of pop music in general is true, it'll be something about partying and making the night last forever and all manner of stupid shit like that, which only raises further questions. You're 13! If you're driiiiiiiiiiiiiiinking and smoooooooooooooooooooooking and doing druuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugs like the true rebel you are, that's some awful songwriting, some tremendously bad parenting and some all round darwin awards level stupidity. However, should there be some degree of responsibility here (oh god what the hell am I even talking about any more?) well that's just flat out tedious. A song about 13 year olds living it up in an age appropriate way, well ain't that just dandy. God I hope she fucks a leper or something.
Stupid moment number two: Less a moment, more a maelstrom of everything everyone hates about communications students in a two hour block of stupid. Now, I'd like to specify, not everyone in this class is stupid, the tutor seems to know what's going on and most of the class aren't retarded. However, there's this one guy, this one guy... one day I'm gonna kill him. I'm gonna kill him so hard he'll die to death (thanks for that one, explosm!). I think I've covered this one before, but "well that's just your opinion" is not a valid response in an argument, especially when the thing discussed isn't even opinion in the first place! This barely functioning sack of crap must have said this about 10 times over the course of the class, at everything, including when the tutor gave us the essay question for the next assignment. He actually argued that the essay question was "just your opinion." Aaaaargh! Factor in the fact that he pronounced "fugitive" with a hard G and I was about ready to throw some chairs. Some days are so much harder than others.
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